CROSSING THE RUBICON

Slowly I walk down slippery stone steps
A mist hovering over the Thames like mustard gas in no man’s land!
The creeping barrage inside my head
Keeping me one step behind insanity
Being by the river chills my bones, yet I feel truly alive
Connected to the past….
My own feelings, emotions like an old door
Drifting away on the current of time
I am stripped naked internally, laid bare
Left only with my faith in the power of deep Love….

Something has happened in my heart
This old warrior king has found his Queen
But the closer I get to her
The further she seems away!

I am sick of this world
The madness, dividing, faux religiosity, virtue-signaling hypocrisy!
Tombs full of dead man’s bones
Whitewashed to make death look magnificent!

Fumbling for some change
To give a kind-faced beggar
Who’s eyes reflect his crushed plans, broken dreams
My mind returning to rule my heart
I think of her, she has captured me I’m no longer free
Two lovers walk by holding hands
I spy their aura as they stop to kiss , embrace
Before disappearing quickly into the night
Like ghosts in a hurry
Returning to the graveyard before dawn
Their’s is a story within my own story…

Perplexed I sit upon a bench
Wheezing in the damp air
No fear, for my assassin has always been myself
Why this? When I had everything in order, planned out?
You entered my heart
Trashed its kitchen!
But don’t leave me,
Don’t go now!
It would be too much to bear
For I truly love you deeply………..

M C BOLTON

JANUARY 2022

THE CURATOR

I wander around this museum of my heart
A lone curator of my soul
Dusting cobwebs of my emotions, my feelings…
Shuffling around in my moth holed cashmere cardigan!
Silk scarf casually tied around my neck
Like a drunken hangman’s noose…
Gently touching memories of lost love
of those that have paid the ferryman…
 
My candle flickering as the draught, like passing ghosts,
Blows particles of the finest dust into my lungs
The flesh of the dead, yet my breath offers not life…
Slowly walking along the corridors of time
Missing the laughter of those long gone
There is no sadness, only memories
Another staircase-Another room
Just numbness, the heart’s permafrost of innocence lost…
 
I truly love her, this woman in my dreams
Who appears at dusk
Gently stroking my hand, as if to remind me
She is here, she is always here
We continue our nightly walk, anxiety engulfing me
For time is slipping awayA crow cries for it is near dawn
Until tomorrow I sigh
I turn in hope, she has gone!
Disappearing into my heart, where she forever sits
upon the throne of my desire…
 
My flickering flame comforts me
It’s reassuring, offering hope…
Slowly I walk down the winding staircase into the cellar
To lay amongst the empty barrels of mirth
Muttering happy inside, even content
knowing this new day will bring the same
Awaiting the night,to wander once more
With my true Love…………
 
 
photo by MNT

Mark C Bolton November 2021

ANTHROPOCENE

If you held me in your arms for eternity
That would not be time enough!
For you are the sweet fragrance of petrichor after the rain…
Everything about you was unpolluted, pure
There’s no falsehood in your being
Snatching my heart for your own
Yet I felt no pain or loss
For it was always yours
Ordained from the beginning
Not by chance or fate, but by nature’s mighty power
The apex of colliding dimensions…

A gentle touch of your hand just enough
To cause creation to stop and wonder
Is perfection once more again about to be created?
Oh! Great Mother Earth
Take me in your arms
Show me how this world should be…….

M C Bolton September 2021 @MarkCBolton1

Hope Valley, photo by The Duke

SISTERS OF MERCY

I knelt in submission before the throne of grace
Guarded by two veiled women of Truth
Sisters of purity, staring deep into my soul…
Feeling pity for this wounded man
whose heart bore the scars of many battles…
Mercy and Love surely were their names
They both stood in silence
Looking without judgement at this corrupted man of flesh…

Wisdom beyond their years, yet without age!
Harbingers of light
Shining into humankind’s hidden depths
Enabling my eyes to see true beauty once more
Each glance filling my heart with Hope, with Love
Making demons shudder-Angels weep…

Granting me God’s favour, mercy, kindness…
So softly walking into my spirit
Setting me free, as slowly they depart
These majestic-regal-spiritual beings
Who have seen, who know life’s secrets
Yet still remain clothed in humility
Leaving me quietly weeping
Knowing they have my heart for eternity…

M C Bolton July 2021

@MarkCBolton1

Sudanese Women in Egypt by Max Slevogt (1914)

ENIGMA

I am just a simple man

in the most complicated of ways

With a basic thinking complexed mind

that’s often led astray

I worry about the things I cannot change 

Don’t change the things I can!

Just a complicated simple man that’s never had a plan…

Just get by day to day

always grateful for my pay

Yet it is my freedom that I truly crave

Delude myself everyday

that I am not the system’s slave 

knowing deep down that is a lie 

I just don’t see the chains!

For I am the world’s most simple man 

on the road again…

Maybe a little complicated, mixed-up, mad?

Aboard my train of pain

I know deep down inside my soul

There’s a regular bunch of guys

very slowly drowning

as they swim against the tide

Writing poems of nonsense 

When their brains are fried……..

M C Bolton, @MarkCBolton1 June 2021

Malaz

I stare into the sun

Longing for your shadow

to pass over me

Filling my cup once more

with the elixir of Love…

Your purity too much

For such tainted eyes to bear

Feeling so vulnerable – yet so safe

in the graceful gentleness of your presence

Kneeling in humble submission

to the Queen of my soul…

My sword thrust deep

into the desert sands of time

your veil of modesty and dignity

caught by the cool evening breeze

revealing such hypnotic perfection

that has caused kings

to wage war to win your favour

I who have served you

through many ages – dimensions

seen empires rise

seen empires fall

Finally catching a glimpse

of Paradise on Earth

In the eternal beauty of your face

Forever capturing my heart

M.C. Bolton May 2021 @MarkCBolton1

The End of the Pier Show

I sit on a deckchair

at the end of the pier

Reflect on my life

how I got here…

As a boy I squandered my money

in the amusement arcade

Rode the ghost train

thought I was brave…

But all I’ve become is another of time’s slaves!

I am now an old person

who looks out to Sea

Searching for memories

of when I was free…

Free from the madness

that runs amok in my head

Walking at times-in boots made of lead!

How did I get here?

It all went so fast

Most of my life-Now lived in the past…

Yet I see a bright future

at the end of the line

Oh! God, please give me a little more time…

Love for my children

is all I’ve got left

As lonely at times

I stand close to the edge…

But I sit on a deckchair

at the end of the pier

Reflecting on my life, the ones I hold dear

Just alone on this deckchair

at the end of the pier

Reflecting on my life ‘n’ the ones I hold dear………………………..

M C Bolton April 2021 @MarkCBolton1

Photo by tc

SANCTUARY

Holding you close against my heart

Something shifted within the depths of my soul

I didn’t want to let you go-our hands casually holding…

Slowly pulling away like a liner leaving the dock

Such majesty, grace, driven by so much power

Enough to battle the mightiest of waves

upon the foreboding Ocean of time…

We of differing faith and age

Drawn together out of love for truth

within ourselves-within each other

Agenda, motive free, pure, edifying

which tempers passion-freedom to just be!

Like two birds that fly together

just for a moment, a brief while

with no destination or reasonable explanation

Yet with a gentle touch, inner tectonic plates moved

In time with Heavenly beings…

Stumbling across this gift

That fell upon us like a boulder from the sky

Nothing will or can now remain the same

An eclipse​ of the heart. without fear or demand

Free to be our true selves, without worry of self-sabotage

Like Angels we hide beneath each other’s wings

Knowing true love has found us today…

M C Bolton, March 2021

@MarkCBolton1

Ravens of Madness

The gauntlets of darkness compress my brain

Feeling constantly stoned, drunk with too much wine

Yet I have partaken of neither grape nor herb in years!

My eyes are not in sync as I stumble around

like a Dickens character trapped inside an unfinished novel

Never to be read or published

Flitting from page to page searching for my lines

For my own story within this crazy story…

These days, even though I sleep longer, I still find no rest

I dread waking up! Oh! so grateful I do…

Has my God left me? Am I deluded?

Sent out of his pity?

For to see the wretched humanity deep within my soul

would be too much sorrow for a man to bear…

Am I a lost boy to conscience?

Alone running through a petrified forest

Thunder, lightning overhead, my own 1812 overture

While shrieking ravens fly above

Mocking! Mocking! Mocking!

Dark ravens of madness that now forever fly inside my head

Mocking! Mocking! Mocking!………………

M C Bolton 2021 @MarkCBolton1

The Watchers

Giants once walked this Earth

Sons and daughters of Heavenly beings

that sowed their seed amongst soil and blood…

Their offspring banished to inner-earth

Watchers over humanity-planetary guardians

Observing mankind’s once so spiritual eyes

blinded by their shared science…

Alarmed as now learned men

arrogantly boast about their powerful intellect…

Evolution of the mind reaching its climactic crescendo!

God is surely dead they cry

As they ridicule those of faith

Archaic believers of myths of legends…

Children of the Nephilim

knowing their own judgement hastily beckons…

Enoch awakes from his slumber

appearing suddenly like a thief in the night

Stealing centuries of time-discarded into landfill

along with unloved ancient heirlooms, containing souls of the lost…

Yet a precious few, those that knew their failings

Who believed in the lamb-purified by his precious blood

Saved to dwell inside the golden cube

No longer cursed by sickness or a prisoner to tainted fallen flesh…

Forever free to wade in the crystal living waters

That eternal gentle flow through a land of giants………

M C Bolton January 2021

@MarkCBolton1