On visiting my heart’s darkest places

finding a small boy

slowly walking through its damp caves of solitude

loquacious dripping tears

like Morse code esperanto

 

Tapping in desperation upon granite

trailing behind this pitiful creature

forever a prisoner in this stone maze

Masks of my many false selves

hewn out of this cold rock

staring like Easter Island heads

deep into my soul…

 

Turmoil, torment – my long lost companions

reminding me of alcohol, drug fuelled evenings

nights of lust masquerading as love

my sober morning conscience

washed away by another drink

before my deluded state exposed

 

‘Why do you wander?’

that is my destiny

never to rest, eat, sleep

until I find what it is I seek

 

Reason-meaning devoid of my quest!

‘tell me your name’ I begged

reaching out his hand

whispering softly like God to Elijah

‘I am you

‘My name is Fear….’

 

© M.C. Bolton September 2019, 

Drawing by @tomhcharles